Who I Am Becoming In 2017

At the last few seconds of 2016, I stood strong, waiting for the fireworks. At the first few minutes of 2017, I noticed how my arm was not tired, my hands not trembling, from holding up my phone to film those 10 continuous minutes of beautiful bursting fires in the sky. That actually surprised me; it seemed that my workout sessions, as irregular as they can get because a university student’s irregular schedule, had paid off.

For many, this is probably a very small insignificant detail, but to me, at that moment, it meant everything. I only started taking care of my fitness and physical health in April 2016 for the first time in my life, and I have come far in terms of physical endurance, as well as pain tolerance and delayed gratification. Maybe not as far as I could have, but far enough.

But most importantly, I stood mentally strong. 

There was a point in 2016 where I felt that all the hardwork I had put into building myself for the past 2 years of staying on my own in Malaysia, all the efforts put into self-esteem and confidence, had been in vain as I was crumbling back to being shy and insecure about the slightest of things. As the saying goes, it takes time to create something, but one second to destroy it. And I had to rebuilt myself in the last months of 2016. I had to slowly but surely get back up and move on with life.

It was so hard. But I did it. Today, I can say that I have succeeded in finding myself again. I took action and got my life back on track.

December 2016 was pretty eventful for me. I started to take initiative again, do things on my own without the fear of being judged. From taking my sister around in KL and Subang, to starting an internship at a creative startup, Mossery 🙂 So far, my environment has been bringing out the best in me. And I’m very grateful for that.

Now, in 2017, I am stronger than ever, knowing a bit more where I am going and where I want to go. 

In 2017, I am taking my life into my own hands. I am planning for the future, but I am also daring myself to be more spontaneous: be that independent woman I’ve always wanted to be and not be afraid to explore on your own (while of course being responsible and aware).

I’m glad that the startup I’m currently working at is a stationery brand which focuses on 2017 planners: I do miss writing down stuff in a yearly diary. So I got myself one and I’m definitely getting more organised, goal-oriented and value-oriented!

I also know that it’s okay to not hold up to new year’s resolutions. I believe in doing my best, and my best doesn’t have to be perfection. 

So let’s hope for the best 🙂 Happy new year!

An Evil Nymph.