This is a list of why I don’t feel like I’m Mauritian.
I’ve lived in front of a waterfront and within 10-15 minutes from a beautiful beach for 19 years, and frankly, I don’t miss it. I haven’t been to a beach for more than a year, and I don’t care. That’s also why I’ve never been interested into travelling to ‘beach’ islands around Malaysia.
The most common language Mauritians use to communicate with one another is Mauritian Creole. But my mum conditioned me to only speak French; she used to scold me if I spoke Creole when I was young. I do understand Creole and people do talk to me in Creole, but I always reply back in French. I just can’t bring myself to speak the Mauritian dialect.
I see so many posts online about how my Mauritian friends studying abroad miss their country and the beach constantly. Posting photos on Independence Day. And some even own a Mauritian flag. I don’t mind it really, but looking at myself, it makes me wonder: why don’t I feel this way too?
I want to be honest here, and I’d like to say that because I’m Chinese, I feel discriminated against back home. Especially because I live in the coastal areas, where, as compared to the cities, Chinese people are very scarce. Therefore, it feels like I’m an alien. From getting ‘ni hao’s on the road to saying I’m baby cute, it gets really annoying.
More random discrimination
People don’t take me seriously because of my height. I’m shorter than the average Mauritian (147cm tall, yes, for real), and because Mauritians are so ‘European-focused’, they still think I’m a freaking baby. Compared to being in Malaysia, it’s actually harder for me to buy a drink in Mauritius.
Clothes, shoes… everything is too big for my Chinese size. Also, nothing really fits my body. Buying skirts in Malaysia is much more convenient for me than buying them in Mauritius.
I might add more topics to the list in the future, but that’s all for now.
Nevertheless, I’m grateful that my Mauritian friends accept me as I am and don’t make me feel any less of a human being. I am pleased to find that a lot of Mauritians read and support my new blog!
If you haven’t checked it out yet, I give advice for university/college students over there.
Do you also feel like you just don’t belong in your native country? Let me know in the comments!
An Evil Nymph.