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Who I Am Becoming In 2017

At the last few seconds of 2016, I stood strong, waiting for the fireworks. At the first few minutes of 2017, I noticed how my arm was not tired, my hands not trembling, from holding up my phone to film those 10 continuous minutes of beautiful bursting fires in the sky. That actually surprised me; it seemed that my workout sessions, as irregular as they can get because a university student’s irregular schedule, had paid off.

For many, this is probably a very small insignificant detail, but to me, at that moment, it meant everything. I only started taking care of my fitness and physical health in April 2016 for the first time in my life, and I have come far in terms of physical endurance, as well as pain tolerance and delayed gratification. Maybe not as far as I could have, but far enough.

But most importantly, I stood mentally strong. 

There was a point in 2016 where I felt that all the hardwork I had put into building myself for the past 2 years of staying on my own in Malaysia, all the efforts put into self-esteem and confidence, had been in vain as I was crumbling back to being shy and insecure about the slightest of things. As the saying goes, it takes time to create something, but one second to destroy it. And I had to rebuilt myself in the last months of 2016. I had to slowly but surely get back up and move on with life.

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My Personal Goals for 2017

2016 has been the best and the worst year for me (and I have a feeling that I say that every year!). It has also been the most hectic year of my life. Challenging, rewarding and often tiring. On the other hand, 2017 is going to be a more ‘chill’ kind of year, at least at the start (and at least that’s what I think).

When the semester starts, I won’t having any particular responsibilities. It would also be my last semester, which is actually more relaxed because I finished all my core units (subjects) this year. I’ll also be graduating and will either be working or applying for a Honours year after that. This part looks hectic, but to me, it is more like a time for me to do some introspection and take a break. Reflect on what I have done so far. Choose my next move wisely.

Therefore, although I’m not a usual ‘resolution list’ person (despite my very very old posts here in this blog haha), I’ve decided to focus on a few personal goals for me to work on and achieve in 2017.

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The Joy of Being Alone

Disclaimer: This was written on Saturday 26th November, on the way back home. A short piece, unedited, that I just felt like sharing. 

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I’ve forgotten how to be alone.

I’ve forgotten how it feels to appreciate a meal outside of my home with my own company.

I’ve forgotten how to take solo adventures, like little trips to the city, and reflect on myself.

This year has been the least lonely year I have ever lived. From being part of a committee, to a community to a family. I’ve constantly been surrounded by friends. I’ve been left with very little time to myself.

So when the last semester of the year was over, I was left with mixed feelings. I was eager to go back to a tranquil lonely life, yet I was also apprehensive of it.

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5th Blog Anniversary | Reflecting On Where I Stand, My Future Career, My Vision

Actually An Evil Nymph’s Blog blog anniversary was on the 1st August and it wasn’t until WordPress congratulated me on that milestone that I realised it. I knew 1st August was something special! Dang it!

Anyways, at that time, I had just published a post a few hours earlier and so I decided to wait a little more before putting up a proper ‘Happy Blog Anniversary’ post. However, yes, since I’m back to school and new into my third year, my responsibilities got in the way. In fact, I would have completely forgotten about blogging it if it was not for my Google Calendar, in which I have set a goal to blog once a week.

That’s how crazy life gets when the semester starts and you are involved in many things, including being a (High, sometimes) Distinction student. I literally need my phone to remind me of everything, haha!

Anyway, it’s been five years, guys. Five years since I started blogging. I can’t describe how much it has opened my eyes to the world… and my own. My blogging style has changed a lot throughout the years, but I believe that the main reason I got so immersed in blogging was not only my passion for writing, but my search for who I am, an identity, to find myself. 

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On The Will To Get Out Of Bed

You’d be walking by the road and chatting with your friends, when suddenly an unstoppable force would pull you out in a blurred mixture of melting colours, as you hear a weirdly familiar melody becoming louder and louder…

And the next thing you know, you are in bed, with your morning alarm ringing next to your ears. You feel the brightness of your phone’s screen glaring back at you as you struggle to move your arms and fingers to swipe and shut that noise down. The realisation of the beginning of day dawns on you as you think of the first few things you have to do this morning.

Another fifteen minutes, you say. You’ve set up more than one alarm. It’ll be easier to wake you up the second time.

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Keep Calm and Slay Rudeness—With These 4 Simple Steps [Guest Post]

“Be kind. Everyone you meet is fighting some battle.”
Philo.

Life throws us numerous curveballs all the time. These can be anything, starting with excruciatingly difficult decisions, to traversing the murky, complicated matters of the mind. For a child in a social situation, I think one of the biggest curveballs is how to react when someone is rude to them. And when I say rude, I mean all-out rudeness, not simple sarcastic comments.

If you observe carefully, when a child is being verbally bullied, you’ll notice that they really don’t know how to react for a moment. If they are more extroverted, they might become defensive and learn how to be rude in return. Or if they are shy (like yours truly), they might just hold onto the hurt of having had to face such a situation and wonder why the other person is being so mean.

Either way, rudeness is something that throws us for a toss, even as adults.

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12 Pockets of Advice a.k.a. 12 Ways To Not Let Life Kill You [Guest Post]

  1. Those nights out or in with your friends, taking you away from your responsibilities when you so desperately need to pay attention to them, are not going to make you smile when you are wondering why you and the group drifted apart. Friends build each other up. Friends look out for each other and study together, or, friends make sure you study too. Friends are not supposed to have fun with you all throughout college or university then dump you when “real-life” calls. Those people have always lived without realism, just the kind of people you should stay away from.
  1. Even if you think people you care about don’t care about what you do for them, do it anyway. Whether it is your family or significant other. Because when you’ve had enough, your conscience is clean- suddenly why do you have to care about undeserving people anymore?
  1. Have a degree of selfishness- because years of selflessness and then the sudden downhill slope realization that you must be selfish- will kill you.

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