love-proposal-hd-wallpapers

Why I Asked Him Out – And Not The Other Way Round

It is not generally easy to ask someone you like out. However, despite the fear of breaking a friendship and of rejection, it is most likely the only way to find that special someone. Opportunities are not to be missed. Risks are worth being taken. Trials and errors. Time to move forward.

1. That first paragraph was my mental state at that time. I had barely dived into my 20’s and therefore I was excited to try out bolder things. I wanted to make the most out of my young adult life. Be daring.

2. I was more confident. That was firstly because I was in university for a longer period than him, while it was only his first semester, and secondly because I was practically his ‘boss’ during the only extra-curricular activity that we had in common – the only thing we had in common. I was also the one to personally recruit him in the team.

Continue reading

rose_art-wallpaper-1280x768 (1)

A Magnificent Rose Smelling Faintly Of Blood

“Love is the world’s infinite mutability; lies, hatred, murder even, are all knit up in it; it is the inevitable blossoming of its opposites, a magnificent rose smelling faintly of blood.”
– Tony Kushner, THE ILLUSION.

“This is a message to all the young women who have found their one and only.

This is a message to the girls who fell in love for the first time.

This is a message to those who believe in Love, because the reality of Love is far from what it really is.

A long term relationship is what we aspire to, because the myth of ‘soulmates’ have haunted us since we were young and stuffed with mediated representations of Love: two people ‘meant’ for each other. Yet, it is in a long term relationship that we learn, and we learn it the hard way: nothing in Real Love is ever like our Ideal idea of Love.”

Continue reading

20160213_154459

A Long-Distance Valentine’s Day

My first celebrated Valentine’s Day ever; and yet I was sitting on the couch on my own at home.

My first reciprocated love ever; and he is 3190 miles away.

My first relationship ever; and filled with months of being separated by the ocean yet with other months waking up next to each other and feeling each other’s hearts.

Skype goodnights.

Midnight ‘I Love You’s.

An unstable distance; a stable romance.

We dive in ‘forever’s.

But it’s not always easy. It sometimes feel like the whole world is against us; while lovers meet on Valentine’s Day, we go on our separate lives, united only by the thought.

I don’t know which is worse: to be lonely on that day or to be unable to spend that day with that someone special.

In the end, let’s simply shrug: we, as true and loving to each other, celebrate Valentine’s Day any other day, every day.

An Evil Nymph.

Heartbreak From A Stranger

I was looking for more violin players for our end-of-year orchestral shown when you appeared on our doorstep and offered to help.

Being the passionate leader that I was, I treated all my musicians as equally and uniquely important to my eyes. Taught you the arts, seeing you as an individual, not as a pawn.

In the middle of our rehearsals, one day, you came up to me and asked for your leave, because you had other more compulsory obligations and could not cope with everything. I understood, because I am human and you too, and let you go.

A side musical competition came up soon after, one that I did not find important but which my team mates did, thus we gave it much attention too.

On the day of the competition, as my orchestra was setting up, I saw you… on the other side of the stage, armed with your brand new violin, side to side with the opposing team.

You were so proud that you won and we lost.

I focused my orchestra back into the end-of-year show, and the latter was in fact a success. By that time I had forgotten all about you. People leave and people change.

The day you broke my heart was the day you came back to me.

Your orchestra had now a higher position than ours. You came to me to ask for my help for a future musical project. In other words, you needed slaves to do your work, because as the winning team, you would not dare degrade yourself to our standards.

The real truth was that you knew absolutely nothing about being in an orchestra, but you aimed for fame and royalty and here you are on top.

I have no choice but to fake a genuine innocent smile and abide by your wishes. My orchestra is under yours.

If not, I would have taken my orchestra in my own fall. And my orchestra is what I care for the most in life. I had to swallow my pride and my broken heart for the sake of my orchestra, its reputation and mobility. I had to close my eyes and let it go, for my orchestra to float up.

You had given me a unique opportunity for my orchestra, one I could not refuse.

~

An Evil Nymph.

The Past, Who We Are and Other Thoughts

It feels like it’s been ages since I last posted on this blog.

This was mainly because I’ve been doing a lot of thinking (which eventually also includes writing, reading and watching anime/TV series ^^).

Three months’ school holiday is way too long, although it’s been filled with seeing new horizons, since I’m in a foreign country, but at some point it pretty much fucks your mind, especially if you’re living on your own. You start getting all deeply philosophical and start questioning every aspect of life.

Or is it just me?

I’d like to share a few of those haunting thoughts that have been following me for a while… and hopefully read your comments afterwards:

1. On Mirrors

I don’t know if I’ve talked about this here but I moved to a cheaper residence at the start of the year and among the furniture available in my room there was no sign of a mirror! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not your vain narcissist typical girl, but I enjoy making up outfits in front of a tall mirror and… well I simply have this ‘strong liking’ for mirrors. Therefore the mirror chase was on! My friend also joined me because she happened to want a mirror as well (peer influence XD). We were of course looking for the cheap options so we looked a little everywhere and took our time before we finally settled on those specific budget-friendly-but-nice-quality mirrors…

Anyway, this whole ‘chase’, that lasted about a month, made me think of something very peculiar about mirrors. It all started when my friend taught me how to know the difference in quality in the glass of the mirror (quite simple actually: just look into both mirrors one after the one and check for any ‘deformities’ in terms of how your body is being reflected… If your head is way bigger than your body you obviously know it’s not a good mirror…). She thus wouldn’t choose a mirror because it didn’t reflect her ‘normally’ i.e. the way she thinks her body is.

This was when the discussion started and my thoughts started to grow.

But how does she know how she is? If one thinks about it, no one can see oneself, except through reflecting glass, like a mirror, but if my friend just proved me that the mirrors can be flawed, then in truth, one can definitely never see oneself.

reflection

Continue reading

Why I Love Anime

I’ve never been a big fan of anime series and I can count on my fingers how many of them I’ve watched in my whole life so far. (Haha, being an Asian has led me not to be interested in Asian stuff.)

However, I have to say, I really really admire anime.

On the rare occasions that I do watch one, I go completely crazy over it.

yoshino And the reason this happens is that anime producers/writers/whatever are simply the greatest storytellers that ever existed.

Indeed, this is a writing-related post (hihi what could you expect from me) and the answer to the ‘why I love Anime’ is simply because of its storytelling.

Continue reading

I Have No Online Life Anymore!

Okay, I have not been blogging for almost two months!

But I’m not dead. I’m still here!

I have also barely been on my Twitter and my YouTube. I kind of update my Instagram from time to time but it’s not like before anymore. My Facebook is the most active I believe because whatever happens in university is posted on Facebook.

And university life just took hold on me completely.

It’s not only about assignments and class tests and upcoming exams and putting my studies first, but also greatly about other activities I’ve been intensely involved with, like the Performing Arts club in school, and also travelling around, going to a music gig, tasting everything everywhere, hanging out with my new friends, dreaming about the opportunities here…

My life has never been so filled. Because for the first time ever since I discovered online communities in 2010, I’ve neglected this online life of mine, no, I’ve forgotten about it! That’s what being an international university student did to me. I have never felt more real and passionate; I have never felt so close to my dreams.

I feel so happy to be here.

rain-3216

I will be blogging from time to time to keep you updated😛

About my YouTube channel though… I have no idea what it’s becoming😄

Anyway, have a great week everyone!

And don’t forget to LIVE!!!

An Evil Nymph.